What is the first thing that every good mud duck learns? Where the private dumpsters are to throw their trash. In order to properly demonstrate the amount of trash they will throw and their complete disregard for anyone’s personal property, we are posting the Labor Day Weekend Mud Duck Dumpster Challenge. These two pictures were taken this morning, before the barrage of mudducks will funnel into our small towns. As you can see the dumpster is maybe half full. You can also see the giant sign that actually covers the front of the dumpster. Tuesday, I will take another picture of the dumpster and post the results. My guess is that there will be trash all over the ground from an overflowing dumpster.

It’s rare when you can get a glimpse into the inner workings of someone’s mind, but that’s exactly what we have here, in an attempt to successfully spell budget.

Budget? Nope. Bugget? Nope. Ahh Budget.

I wonder if they had to use spell check and just wrote it in later to save face?

This posting is hopefully the first step in demonstrating why we harbor hatred for the mud ducks from the Minneapolis/St. Paul Twin Cities area. This idiot is building his house with 4×4 posts for footings. If I remember right, they didn’t even splurge on treated posts. Located on clay soil, this house should last about 2 years, after which time the insurance payers of Wisconsin will foot the bill to rebuild it after it falls down the hill and into Lake Gitchi Gumi. (That’s Superior for all you mudducks) We can only hope that it falls on a weekend when they are actually in it.

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I was doing some searches on google.com to see if I could pull our nasty bathrooms up, when I found this on iStockphoto.com. I looks like there are hints of a sidesaddle soiling. It’s unfortunate that we can’t see the whole bowl.

• Adhesion: 4.0
• Color: 4.0
• Shock Value: 7.0
• Texture: 2.0
• Volcanic Explosivity: 4.0
• Overall Rating: 7.0

The work toilet has once again been hit, and as usual the “Burrito Kid” is most likely responsible. We know that the “Burrito Kid” has been eating Egg McMuffins for the last week or so, but no one witnessed todays breakfast. Best guess, breakfast burrito. We may have to conduct a MythBusters like experiment using breakfast burritos to find out whether they are in fact the ultimate soiling breakfast.

• Adhesion: 3.0
• Color: 3.0
• Shock Value: 5.0
• Texture: 2.0
• Volcanic Explosivity: 5.0
• Overall Rating: 5.0

Just like the X games, the level of difficulty on the soilings continues to increase with the addition of the side saddle soiling. The Soiler happened to capture this new and exciting style, which must have been achieved by either blasting on one cheek or side saddle. Unfortunately, we may never know the true methodology of this rare and risky maneuver. This soiling alone may lead talks about adding a difficulty category to the rankings.

• Adhesion: 6.0
• Color: 5.0
• Shock Value: 4.0
• Texture: 4.0
• Volcanic Explosivity: 3.0
• Overall Rating: 5.0

 
I captured this gem in a local campground earlier this year. The picture is rather poor quality, but I didn’t want to anger the mullets. In case you can’t tell it’s a semi-tractor with an Airstream camper rigged on the back. Twenty dollars says the fridge is full of Steel Reserve and/or the sponsored beverage of their favorite Nascar driver.

Things took a turn for the worse in the office, as yet another Burrito Kid soiling stirred up anger. “Enough’s, enough! If you’re gonna do that clean it up!” an angry co-worker screamed. To make matters worse, the Burrito Kid had soiled and ran this morning. You wouldn’t tell Monet to burn his paintings or have the Sistine Chapel torn down. Neither shall we destroy another man’s artwork.

• Adhesion: 4.0
• Color: 4.0
• Shock Value: 4.0
• Texture: 2.0
• Volcanic Explosivity: 4.0
• Overall Rating: 4.0

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